The Melody of an Ambulance

This journal isn’t worth it anymore

Nobody reads it

And I can’t say how I really feel for fear that someone will read this

Back to the drawing board I supposeeeee

i’d do it
but i can’t

because my brothers
will look at their children
and tell them that they would’ve loved their aunt

because nate needs me here
and he might not say it
but somewhere inside
he does

because heather would fall apart

because my parents
would never ever forgive themselves
for being so blind

i’m so scared right now

i regret Saturday night
very much so
because i made a fool of myself
because i felt like complete shit the day after
because i let nate down
because i let myself down

way to go, randi
didn’t think you could accomplish something like that
ever

randi, you stupid, foolish, little girl